Man catches gizmonotic virus

Ameritorius Professor Broughton D’Lirium commented on a disturbing glimpse of the future today:

It seems that in the future we will not only have to worry about the rise of antibiotic resistance and the emergence of superbugs, we’ll have computer viruses to contend with too. One shudders to think of the diabolical devastation that will result from an epidemic of infected pacemakers, defibrillators and implanted drug pumps….

UCEM has decided to take decisive action. From this day forward all UCEM-sanctioned infectious diseases specialists will be required to have expert competencies in computer science. This is our only hope of impeding the progress of these pernicious pixellated pestilences.   Furthermore, as it is impossible to fight an unnamed enemy, I hereby christen this new threat ‘gizmonosis’

Infectious diseases specialists of the future, enroll yourself in a computer science course now!

computer-virus-humans

Definitions for MUPPETs and F.UCEMs:

  • gizmonosisnoun. A disease that is passed from a gizmo to a human.
  • gizmonoticadjective.
  • gizmonosesplural.
  • nososGreek. Disease.
  • gizmo — a gadget (origin unknown)

Read the full story courtesy of BBC News.


Utopian College of Emergency for Medicine

Chris is an Intensivist and ECMO specialist at the Alfred ICU in Melbourne. He is also the Innovation Lead for the Australian Centre for Health Innovation at Alfred Health and Clinical Adjunct Associate Professor at Monash University. He is a co-founder of the Australia and New Zealand Clinician Educator Network (ANZCEN) and is the Lead for the ANZCEN Clinician Educator Incubator programme. He is on the Board of Directors for the Intensive Care Foundation and is a First Part Examiner for the College of Intensive Care Medicine. He is an internationally recognised Clinician Educator with a passion for helping clinicians learn and for improving the clinical performance of individuals and collectives.

After finishing his medical degree at the University of Auckland, he continued post-graduate training in New Zealand as well as Australia’s Northern Territory, Perth and Melbourne. He has completed fellowship training in both intensive care medicine and emergency medicine, as well as post-graduate training in biochemistry, clinical toxicology, clinical epidemiology, and health professional education.

He is actively involved in in using translational simulation to improve patient care and the design of processes and systems at Alfred Health. He coordinates the Alfred ICU’s education and simulation programmes and runs the unit’s education website, INTENSIVE.  He created the ‘Critically Ill Airway’ course and teaches on numerous courses around the world. He is one of the founders of the FOAM movement (Free Open-Access Medical education) and is co-creator of litfl.com, the RAGE podcast, the Resuscitology course, and the SMACC conference.

His one great achievement is being the father of two amazing children.

On Twitter, he is @precordialthump.

| INTENSIVE | RAGE | Resuscitology | SMACC

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