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Category UCEM

Utopian Medicine is a medical discipline devoted to the pre-emptive, pre-emotive and peri-departmental management of patients coordinated by the Utopian College of Emergency for Medicine (UCEM).

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UCEM welcomes Prof Stickler

With the students mental welfare in mind, Prof Stickler uses his wry and perceptive sense of humour to great effect. For example, in the chapter on Bayesian inference his uproarious quote “10100111101101011101110001100110001100101011011010101010110100110000112” is still considered an exemplar of Euclidean literary miscellany within niche binary enclaves around the world.
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UCEM Warns Against ADHD Treatment

Today, UCEM's Professor Stickler warned of the negative consequences of the current epidemic of methylphenidate and dexamphetamine used for the treatment of Attention Deficit/ Hypersensitivty Disorder (ADHD) in young people.
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UCEM position statement on alcohol and idiocy

In social outings involving idiots, alcohol was found to protect neurons against apoptosis in smarter individuals. The delay in sensory relay caused by alcohol consumption is the likely mechanism for this phenomenon.
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Adaptive parasitology and free parking

Natural Killer Not Functioning to Combat Non-Presentation of MHC Due to Downstream Malfunction of Toll Like Receptor. A lesson in adaptive parasitology, and free parking. Full publication review from the Journal of Life as a Poor Science Analogy.
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UCEM PR Supervisor Promoted

Egerton Yorick Davis IV was born in his ancestral home of Caughnawauga, Quebec. His early career was beset by naysayers who doubted he could ever emerge from the shadow of his great-grandfather, Egerton Y. Davis, the former US Army Captain renowned for first describing penis captivus.
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Diploma of HTFU

UCEM announce the inauguration of a new educational qualification - the DipHTFU. Who is the first recipient of this prestigious award...
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UCEM Promotes ‘Toughen Up’ Pill

Following on from its campaign against Softness, the Pharmacological Hegemony of the UCEM is pleased to announce, in conjunction with TTFU Pharmaceuticals the release of its new pill.